Do you hide your emotional wounds behind a barricade of roadblocks that prevents you from being in a relationship?
Are You The Reason Why You Are Single?
When it comes to dating, the first rule is to love yourself first. The rest will come easily. Of all the relationships that you will ever have throughout your life, the most important one is the relationship that you have with yourself.
How you feel about yourself is going to reflect in every other relationship you ever become involved in. If you have bad feelings about yourself, the chances are good that you are going to have a hard time being in a loving relationship. Those negative feelings will show themselves in the way you conduct yourself with the person you are supposed to be in love with. However, if you find it impossible to love yourself, how are you going to be able to love anyone else?
If you are having some issues with loving yourself, there are some ways that you can push that along. First of all, learn the definition of self-respect. When you respect yourself, you will make sure that others adhere to the boundaries that you have set for yourself. As long as you allow everyone to cross those boundaries, your life is invaded and you are no longer able to have any self-respect because people are always going to be taking advantage of you. A lot of people realise it when they are being taken advantage of and it produces feelings of hurtfulness and humiliation.
Recognise that you are a valuable and worthwhile human being. When you let yourself be berated and trod upon by others, you develop a sense of being worthless. Never let anyone tell you that you are stupid, dumb or unimportant. If you allow this from people, soon enough you will start to believe it yourself. It nibbles away at your self-confidence and self-esteem until you actually believe that you do not deserve anyone or anything good in your life. You end up settling for those guys or girls that expect you to be their gravy train.
So many men and women in abusive relationships are there because they allowed others to make them believe that they belonged in those types of relationships. They have been taught through the years that they deserve to be hit and yelled at by the person that is supposed to love them above all overs. In spite of what you may believe, that is not love. An individual that will treat his or her partner that way does not love or respect him or her.
If you find that you have these feelings of worthlessness, you must get some help in fixing that immediately. Make no mistake; if you feel this way about yourself, you are damaged or broken in some way and need to be repaired. The person or persons responsible for treating you so badly that have caused you to view yourself this way needs more help than you do. They need to learn the damage they have caused and they need to learn to feel shame for having done that. Then they can get to work on why they felt the need to behave that way.
Do whatever you must to love yourself. It is the only way you will ever have a happy and successful relationship with anyone else.